Wednesday, September 28, 2011

If your boyfriend goes to the strip club:

I have not updated my blog in what seems like forever. Life has been pretty busy lately. First of all, let me get a little personal. I DO NOT LIKE BACHELOR PARTIES! Not that I've been to one, but my boyfriend surely experienced his first and last bachelor party. The typical "guy stuff" happened, and I was not happy at all! They of course went to strip clubs/bikini bars. I don't know about you girls, but I have a problem with that. I don't want nasty strippers dancing ON or AROUND my boyfriend wearing almost nothing, and quite honestly I don't want him lookin' at them! If you wanna be with me, you shouldn't be wanting to look at another woman, let alone go to a place like a strip club. I've come up with the perfect disciplinary actions if your boyfriend ever does something like this.

#1. Call your mom, grandma, and anyone else you can think of and say, "You would NEVER guess what (insert name here) did!" And tell them all the details. 

#2. Two days later, invite him to your grandmother's house for lunch. :) 

#3. Post on his Facebook wall... Tell him how much you love him even though he decided to spend time with women who make a living showing their cellulite and boobies.

#4. Anytime you can throw in the words, "boob" "stripper" or "dollar bills"... Do so!

#5. When you two love birds are watching TV together and a Victoria's Secret commercial comes on, COVER HIS EYES in a panic! And tell him he saw plenty of that last weekend.

#6. If you happen to drive by a strip club or a bikini bar BURST INTO TEARS! Have a complete PMS, "oh my gosh i am so fat", youwenttoastripclub fit! :) This will become annoying and he will probably try not to even drive by these places again.

#7. You want a puppy. You want one now. Tell him you want a puppy because a puppy doesn't lie and doesn't do shady things.

#8. You deserve foot massages. Plenty of them. Make sure you walk outside in the dirt a little bit before you put your foot in his lap for your much deserved message.

#9. In the middle of all of this cut off all communication with him. Go out with your girls and don't call or text him. He has no idea where you are. Let his mind wonder what you're up to. When you finally talked to him... you weren't doing anything. "You tried calling me 34 times? You texted me all day long?? Hmm. must be something wrong with my phone. Or perhaps the music was too loud where I was." He will then ask where you were, suspiciously say "nowhere." Karmaaaa.

At this point, if he really loves you, he will realize he hurt you. He will realize what happens when he does something stupid. And chances are he will NEVER do anything like that again. :) The random crying outbursts will really get to him. It was a one-time thing for him to go to a strip club. I know it wasn't like him, it was just for a bachelor party... but girls, it is a no-no to ignore my calls, and then lie to me about where he's been. Punishment is deserved.

;) let me know if any of you try these out. they have a pretty good success rate.


  1. Awww hunnie! I have been there! UGH. So, I actually used to live in Las Vegas so obviously I've been in this situation. I dumped the guy that I was dating because he lied to me and was so sketchy about it. It definitely is hurtful when guys make decisions like going to strip clubs. I just don't get it. For the record, you totally deserve a puppy :) Hope you're doing okay...let me know if you need anything!! xoxoxo <3 love & hugs!!

  2. Haha I love this!! I just found your cute blog and I am so glad I did!! I know how you feel.. a guy I dated before meeting my fiance use to go out with his guy friends and be super sketchy all the time.. he wasn't a very good guy anyways! keep your head up and stand your ground!


  3. Oh my word you are so right haha! I would NOT feel comfortable with that at all! My man is my man! p.s. I missed you commenting on my blog so keep it up :)

  4. HAHAHA! Girl, you crack me up!! So sorry you had to go through that, however I'm so glad we got to hang out this weekend! I love ya and hope you have a fabulous weekend!

  5. Hahahahhahaha! Oh my word! I definitely laughed out loud at a few of those!

    I am sure you wont have any more problems! That is not a fun situation to be in. I have had some friends deal with this... now I have a website to give them!

    I would definitely not be ok with any of that for a bachelor party! I have broken down the do's and don'ts for when my fiancé has his. First on his LIST... PUT MY BESTIES HUSBAND (Who is also one of his groomsmen) IN CHARGE!! Keep that one in mind for future use ;)

  6. HAHAHAHA! I could pee my pants after reading this! So funny! My boyfriend (who now knows he made a HUGE mistake) went to a strip club while visiting our friend in Jacksonville & wouldn't pick up the phone or answer my texts! I had no idea he was at one & texted our friend who he was visiting & he said they were FISHING! Well they told our friends girlfriend something TOTALLY different & she called me & asked what they were up to, I said fishing, she said McDonalds, & OH BUDDY WORLD WAR III! Hahaha.

    So now I always make fun of him when we are fishing or when he says he's going fishing I tell him to "NOT CATCH ANYTHING" hahahaha.

  7. I broke up with my ex about a month and a week ago. We were going out for 4 months before hand. We are both college students had great chemistry, same major, shared same dreams, we were perfect for each. However, School and my work routine got more intense and I was not able to spend time with him. I had my slips and falls and was not attentive of him like I should have. He started treating me indifferent and a lot of little things about me bothered him. I woke up every day hoping things would be different, I tried my hardest but it seems he didn’t care about me anymore. Two weeks after school ended he broke up with me saying that he always found little things that made him frustrated with me and he didn’t know why and that he didn’t love me. Even though we never got to the stage we said it to each other. I acknowledge what he said and didn’t say anything back. However a day later I wrote him something expressing how I felt that I was sorry and was willing to work hard because I cared about him. He however answered that he didn’t think we should give it another shot. After that I had no contact with him for almost a full month . I order love spell from this website and my husband change. He became good, nice person and he loved me again. I’m very happy about that.